"Protect your own sensitivity yourself, you fool."
These are the words of the poet Noriko Ibaragi.
Lately, this line has started to come to mind at unexpected moments.
In daily life, I find myself, without noticing, drifting toward the side that is being "asked of."Meeting expectations.That in itself is an essential attitude in work. But in the process,the outline of who I am becomes slightly blurred.There are certainly moments when I feel that sense of unease.
While responding to what is asked of me,how much of my own sense is actually involved? To what extent can I take that action,as truly my own? These days,I have become more conscious of that.
For example, the "personality" others see in me.They probably think I listen to this kind of music, or live this kind of life.I feel I no longer hesitate as muchto step a little outside those images as I once did. That does not meanI am dismissing other people's expectations; it means pulling my own sense of thingsback to my side, at least for a moment.
I can only receive the world through this body.I cannot borrow someone else's sensitivity,and I cannot have someone else feel in my place. That is why,however incomplete it may be, I want to remain honest with my own senses.
Protect your own sensitivity.
First, acknowledge it for yourself.
After all these years,I have finally come to feel that way.
